Keeping Score in Marriage Never Works

Girlfriends, keeping score in marriage never works. If you are feeling frustrated and tired in your marriage right now you might be keeping track of everything your husband does wrong.

Let me give you a 2-step process to try to turn things around.

1. Stop keeping track of everything he does wrong and start keeping track of everything he does right. And thank him for it. Thank him for taking out the trash (some husbands don't do that). Thank him for going to work for your family (some husbands don't do that). Thank him for playing with the kids today... Any small thing -- notice it and thank him for it.

2. Start doing kind things for him every day without the expectation of him doing anything nice for you in return. Pick up his dry cleaning. Cook his favorite dinner. Buy him something special. Nothing nice you do for another person will ever be done in vain. Don't be afraid to do something nice for your husband for fear of "getting taken advantage of"  or because he hasn't done anything nice for you lately. 

I promise you girls, God sees your tender heart. He knows you are trying. He knows you just want to feel loved. But in order to receive, you have to give. So, give it some effort and see what happens -- I bet you'll notice some changes in your hubby's behavior too! 

I want you to know I have been in your shoes, and one thing that has helped me is remembering the image I think I will see on that fateful day when I get to heaven. Jesus is going to be standing there to greet me with a great big restful hug, and he is going to say, "Well-done, good and faithful servant."

Because truly we have just one job while we are here on this earth, and that job is to love the people around us. Maybe those people don't always love us back the way we would like to be loved. But that is OK, because we have God's love and the promise of heaven. Just that thought alone brings me peace and gives me energy to get back to it!