Choosing Love in Marriage

​I want to talk today about the two types of minds that we have…and relate it to marriage to help you navigate sticky situations better. This is one of the greatest teachings I have learned.
 
We all have a higher mind and a lower mind.
 
Our higher mind is connected to God. It is peace, love, joy and trust. All thoughts from our higher mind will be based in love.
 
Our lower mind is more of the human mind that brings in the fear, worry, lack and negativity.
 
Think about it. God IS love. But, fear, worry, lack and negativity are not LOVE. They are the opposite of love. They are not from God. The goal is to try to live more from our higher mind. We get to choose, though.
 
Some people just can’t seem to get out of their lower mind, and they are miserable in their lives and in their marriage. It is the people who are willing to try to spend time in their higher mind that do well and turn their marriages around.
 
Let’s explore the topic of a husband who has to travel for work as an example.
 
Your lower mind will tell you it’s not fair. He gets to go away, while you are there doing everything…all by yourself…again. It will tell you he does not care about you. It will tell you it is bad that he is going to miss a band concert or doctor’s appointment. It will keep you looking at all of the many ways this trip is hurting you and making you feel exhausted.
 
Your higher mind will help you feel more peace. Your higher mind will help you see one way you could lesson the stress is by asking for help from friends and family. Your higher mind will help you realize you do not have to do everything as perfectly as normal while your husband is away. Maybe it’s cereal for dinner tonight?
 
Your higher mind will remind you that you love your husband and he loves you. That you are a team. Your higher mind will help you think of ways to welcome him home and ease his transition back into a busy home after being away and on his own. Your higher mind will bring you thoughts of compassion and love for your spouse.
 
Thinking from your higher mind is something to practice. When you notice the thoughts of the lower mind creeping in – those of fear, worry, lack and negativity – you can flip your focus to the higher mind. Like a switch. This is an act of spiritual growth. Please do not beat yourself up for having the lower mind thoughts, though. They are normal. But you don’t have to accept them.
 
We do have a choice when these negative thoughts come in. We can stay stuck in the negativity and see only our problems and challenges, or we can flip the switch and see the opportunity for love and spiritual growth. You get to choose!