Author Corrie ten Boom said, “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.”
How true is that? Worry is such a drain of our mental and physical energy.
But, believe it or not, it’s not totally a bad thing — IF we allow it to move us into action. And that’s what I want to teach you.
In today’s podcast, we will talk about 6 steps to stop worrying so that you can feel more energetic and purposeful in your life! I hope you’ll tune in!
If you need more inspiration, download my Ultimate Guide to Guilt-Free Self-Care HERE! It’s a Guide to help you take care of yourself in mind, body and spirit so you can feel like your best self every day.
And join us in the Life Designed Community on Facebook!
Welcome to A Life Designed.
My name is Tina Haisman. I teach busy moms how to get everything done and still have time and energy for themselves. My passion is for helping women create more heart-to-heart connection with their husband and children so they can feel deeply fulfilled in those most important relationships.
The topic of today’s podcast is 6 Steps to Stop Worrying
But before we get started I want to let you know I have created a free download call the Ultimate Guide to Guilt-Free Self-Care. I’m really proud of this guide. It’s a Guide to help you take care of yourself in mind, body and spirit so you can feel like your best self every day. And that topic goes just perfectly with our theme today! Visit my website tinahaisman.com to download it.
Also, I have a FREE private group on Facebook where you can come to get inspiration for your life. It’s called A Life Designed. It’s actually a happy place on Facebook. I hope you’ll join us!
Now let’s Dive IN and talk about 6 Steps to Stop Worrying
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and immediately began worrying about something.
Maybe it’s about your job.
Or your health.
Or something to do with your child.
Or your marriage.
Your mind just gets going. Thinking about all of the possible scenarios for what could go wrong. It’s so frustrating. It’s hard for me to fall back asleep when that happens.
But nighttime isn’t the only time I worry. I’m a recovering professional worrier!
Worrying is so goofy, because if you think about it. It really doesn’t do anything for us. But somehow we hang onto it, like it’s going to help something. Like it’s going to make us feel better, when really it makes us feel terrible.
The truth is that worry is a waste of time.
We tend to worry about things in the past or things in the future. We’re not generally worried about this exact moment. Have you ever thought about that?
Most likely everything is fine in this moment.
So if we are worrying about the past, that is pointless, because we can’t change it.
AND if we are worrying about the future, that is also pointless, because it doesn’t help fix anything in advance.
We know this, but we can’t seem to control our minds to make the worry stop.
The ironic thing is – our mind is the only thing we have control over in this world.
We can never control other people. And we can’t always control our circumstances. But we can definitely control our minds.
That’s what we need to do to stop worrying!
So many of us think our thoughts are automatic. That they are something we can’t control. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
Every. Thought. Is. Optional.
Let me repeat that, in case you missed it.
Every thought is optional.
So, what’s the big deal with that? Well, it’s kind of a big deal.
Here’s the way the world works. Your thoughts create your feelings. And your feelings are what cause you to take action.
Positive thoughts equal positive feelings equal Positive actions.
Worried thoughts equal Worried feelings equal Worried results.
Nothing good is happening here.
So, I hope I’ve convinced you that it is worthwhile to try to stop worrying.
So that’s what we’ll spend the rest of the podcast talking about. The How. You know me. I like to give you practical tips. So, I’m going to take you through 6 steps to stop worrying.
Before we dive in, you will notice I tell you to write things down in each step. This is very purposeful. If you really want to stop worrying, you have to get out of your head. And the best way to do that is to put it on paper. So, get your pen and paper ready.
Step 1. is to identify the thought that is causing you worry. When you notice yourself feeling worried, ask yourself “what is causing me to feel worried,” and write down everything that comes to mind.
Then ask yourself. “How are these thoughts serving me right now?”
It’s a good point to ponder, because most likely you are not going to come up with a positive reason of how these thoughts are serving you. Worry is a waste of time.
Step 2. Is to write down all of the bad things that could happen if this worry becomes reality. And try to think about what is the worst thing that could happen if this worry becomes reality.
This will help you get clear about what you’re really thinking below the surface. What are you really afraid of?
This step is important, because most of the time what we are worrying about is never going to come true. And if it does, it will not be nearly as bad as we think.
For example, here is one of the top worries moms share with me. I’m worried I’m screwing up my children. If I do screw them up, they’ll be terrible people and my life will be ruined.
Step 3. Is to ask yourself, “What do I know for sure? What are the facts?” Then write down any actual facts that you know about the situation. Not opinions here or more worry. What is the actual current situation at this. These could be really basic. But they will show you what is actual and real and sort it out from what is being imagined in your mind.
If we carry on with our children example. The actual facts are that everything is fine with your children now. You have plenty of time to teach them the things you want to teach them.
Step 4. Is to ask yourself, what would I like to feel, instead of worry.
Make a list of some different feelings that you would like to have instead of worry. Is it peace? Contentment? Excitement? Pick the one you like best.
Then find a new thought to focus on when the worry thought comes to mind.
So, back to our parenting example, when you feel worried about screwing up your child. You could think, “Everything is fine right now.” Or “I have plenty of time to teach her the things I want to teach her.”
Step 5. Ask yourself, “What can I control?”
We’ve already talked about this a little bit, right? We can’t control what other people say or do. Sometimes we can’t control the circumstances. But what we can control are our thoughts, feelings and actions.
So write down what you have control over in this instance. In our example, you can control what you teach your children and how you parent them.
And that leads us to …
Step 6 is to take action to alleviate the worry. Once you’ve identified exactly what you’re worried about, what the facts are, how you want to feel about it, and what you can control, do yourself a favor and take a small action step to help alleviate the worry.
Maybe in this instance of worrying about screwing up your children, you make a list of all of the lessons you want to teach them before they fly the coop. Then come up with a plan to teach a lesson every so often.
This action steps will get you moving in the right direction. It will feel so much better.
Another great step that brings peace is to imagine handing your worry up to God. Give it to him and ask for his help.
Matthew 6:34 says “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
And I think that brings us to another really good point. Friends, I think we think that we will sometime get to the point where we don’t have anymore problems or anything else to worry about. But that isn’t true.
As we work through our current problems, we will solve them and move on to new problems.
It actually brings me peace to think about it this way. In essence there will always be something for us to work on.
But we get to choose. Will we let worry drag us down and drain our energy or will we recognize it when we see it and do something about it and move on?
If you would like to know more about how you can worry less, message me for a complimentary consultation. We can take a look at what is happening in your life now, how you think it should be and come up with a plan to get you there.
In the meantime. Remember! I have created a free Ultimate Guide to Guilt Free Self Care for you. That’s a great place to start having fun!
Don’t forget to join the Life Designed Community on Facebook!
Thank you! See you next week!