 Photo by Gustavo Fring I will never forget that morning.
It was my turn to bring in the snack for my daughter’s preschool class. On the way to school, we stopped at the grocery store to pick something up. Nothing fancy—just some goldfish and apple sauce. I grabbed them quickly, checked it off my list, and we headed into the classroom. I handed the bag of snacks to one of the teachers. She looked inside, smiled sweetly, and said, “Oh… you’re the simple mom.” Ouch. She probably didn’t mean anything by it. In fact, it may have even been a compliment. But in that moment, it landed deep. Because it touched something I was already quietly insecure about. Other moms brought in beautiful, homemade snacks—rainbow fruit kabobs, fresh muffins, creative little Pinterest-worthy ideas. And me? I brought goldfish and applesauce. I remember standing there, feeling small. Labeled. Defined by one small moment. The simple mom. And without even realizing it, I started to wear that label. Maybe for you, it’s not “simple mom.” Maybe it’s something else.
But over time, those little labels start to add up. They shape how you see yourself. They quietly define what you believe you’re capable of. They shrink parts of you you didn’t even realize were fading. Until one day, without saying it out loud, you start to feel it: I’m just a mom. How We Lose Ourselves It doesn’t happen all at once. It happens in small moments—like a comment in a classroom, or a comparison you didn’t mean to make. It happens when you start measuring yourself against everyone else. It happens when you get so focused on doing motherhood “right” that you slowly disconnect from who you are.
And without even noticing, your identity begins to shrink. Until one day, you hear yourself say it: “I’m just a mom.” But What If That’s Not the Truth? What if the problem isn’t that you’ve become “just a mom”… What if the problem is that you’ve started believing a version of yourself that was never meant to define you? Because here’s what I’ve come to see, both in my own life and in the lives of the women I walk with: You were never meant to fit into someone else’s mold of what a mom should be. You were created with a specific personality. A unique set of gifts. A way of showing up that is entirely your own. And when you try to be someone you’re not—even in subtle ways—it doesn’t feel good. Not because you’re failing. But because you’re out of alignment with who you truly are. The Shift That Changed Everything That preschool moment stayed with me. And over time, I began to look at it differently. Instead of hearing it as a quiet criticism… I chose to hear it as truth. I am a simple mom. I don’t love elaborate food prep. I don’t feel energized by creating Pinterest-worthy snacks. But I do bring other things into my home and my motherhood. I bring presence. I bring connection. I bring love in ways that feel natural and true to me. And when I stopped trying to be someone else… I felt free. Finding Yourself Again If you’ve been feeling lost in motherhood, I want you to know this: You don’t need to reinvent yourself. You don’t need to become a “better” version of someone else. You simply need to come back to yourself. Start here:
These aren’t small questions. They are the doorway back to you. You’re Still In There That label—“simple mom”—could have become something that made me feel less than. Instead, it became something that grounded me. A reminder that I don’t have to be everything… to be exactly who I’m meant to be. And the same is true for you. You are not “just a mom.” You are a whole person. With depth. With purpose. With a way of loving and living that matters. And she’s still in there. Not lost. Not gone. Just waiting to be seen again. Ready to Stop Running on Empty? Download my FREE Ultimate Guide to Guilt-Free Self-Care → Or if you're ready for personalized support: Book a complimentary consultation → You don't have to do this alone. With love, Tina
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