Tina Haisman Coaching
  • Home
  • About
  • Work with Me
  • Speaking
  • Blog
  • Testimonials
  • Contact

You're Not an Angry Mom. You're a Depleted Mom.

3/2/2026

0 Comments

 
Picture
I was sitting in my living room with my two toddlers, and I could feel it building.

That tightness in my chest. The clench in my jaw. The way my patience was hanging on by a thread.

Someone was whining. Someone was crying. Someone needed something from me — again.

And I just... snapped.

I yelled. Over something small. Something that didn't deserve that reaction.

And immediately, I felt awful.

What is wrong with me? I don't want to be this kind of mom.

Maybe you've been there too?

Here's what nobody tells you: The problem isn't that you have an anger problem. The problem is that you're running on empty.

The Day Everything Changed
Back when my kids were toddlers, I hit a breaking point. I was exhausted, on edge and stressed out from all the demands of motherhood.

I asked my girlfriends what to do, and they said, "Go get a massage or something."

So I did.

Once I was lying on the massage table, I started crying. Just releasing all of the stress. As the therapist massaged my arms from my shoulders down to my fingertips, I imagined all the toxins and negativity being pushed out.

It felt amazing. So purifying.

After the massage, I had more time to do something else, but I couldn't figure out what to do,
so I just went back home.

Big mistake.

Because less than two minutes after walking in the door, someone was crying, someone was hanging on me, someone was needing something.

And all of that stress felt like it just heaped right back onto my shoulders.

I was so frustrated. I did the "self-care" thing. It didn't work.

Here's What I Learned
Most of us wait to do self-care until we're ready to explode. We treat it like a fire extinguisher instead of fire prevention.

What I needed was to build up my reserves consistently — not just when I was about to blow.

So I set out to figure out what real, sustainable self-care looks like. And I discovered a formula in the Bible.

In Mark 12:30, Jesus told us to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.
If we're called to love God with those four things, then we need to take care of those four aspects of ourselves.

Think about it:
Heart — Your emotions and relationships
Soul — Your spiritual life
Mind — Your mental health and growth
Strength — Your physical body and energy


When even ONE of these areas is depleted, everything suffers.

And when you're depleted? That's when you yell at your kids over spilled milk.

What Wholistic Self-Care Actually Looks Like
Self-care doesn't always look Instagram-worthy. Sometimes it's saying no, resting, going to the doctor, or asking for help.

Here's what caring for each area can look like:
  • Heart: Spend quality time with friends, journal, be kind to yourself
  • Soul: Pray, go to church, spend time in nature
  • Mind: Read for pleasure, take a class, invest in personal growth
  • Strength: Get a massage, go for a walk, move your body

Here's What Happened
When I started taking care of myself consistently — not just when I was about to explode — everything changed.

I stopped yelling as much.

Not because I learned anger management techniques.

Because I wasn't angry anymore. I was filled up. I had something to give.

I became more patient with my kids. I showed up more present. I felt happier and less resentful.

Proverbs 31:17 says: "She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks."
Do you feel like you're living vigorously? Or are you just trying to survive the day?

Your Simple Action Step
Here's what I want you to do:

Make a list of 10 things you love to do for self-care in each of these four areas: Heart, Soul, Mind, and Strength.

Then, pick 1 thing from each category to do every day.

When you focus on your self-care consistently:
  • You'll have more time and energy
  • You'll feel happier and less resentful
  • You'll show up present and patient
  • You'll stop yelling at your kids over small things

Not because you're trying harder to control your anger.

Because you're no longer running on empty.

You Can't Pour from an Empty Cup
God didn't design motherhood to mean depleting yourself. The abundant life Christ promised isn't supposed to feel like survival mode.

When you take care of yourself — your heart, soul, mind, and strength — you're not being selfish.

You're becoming the mother God created you to be.

Your kids don't need a perfect mom.

They need a present mom. A patient mom. A mom who isn't running on empty.

Ready to Stop Running on Empty?
Download my FREE Ultimate Guide to Guilt-Free Self-Care →

Or if you're ready for personalized support:
Book a complimentary consultation →

You don't have to do this alone.

With love,
Tina
0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.


      Download Your Free Ultimate Guide to Guilt-Free Self-Care!

    Submit

Copyright © 2026 Tina Haisman, LLC

Home    About    Work With Me  Leadership Coaching   Teen Coaching   Speaking    Blog    Testimonials    Contact
  • Home
  • About
  • Work with Me
  • Speaking
  • Blog
  • Testimonials
  • Contact