 Years ago, I found myself in a familiar pattern with my husband.
He would call me around 6 p.m.—just as the kids and I were waiting for him to sit down for dinner—and say, “Hey, I’m not going to make it home by six.” And every time, it lit something in me. I’d snap. I’d huff. I’d feel hurt and unseen. He’d get defensive. I’d shut down. And just like that, we were in it again. Stuck in the same loop. But here’s the thing: It was never just about the time. It was about me holding the weight of the evening alone. It was about the thousand invisible tasks I’d already done that day. It was about my longing to feel like we were a team. And for him? It wasn’t about being late. It was about not wanting to disappoint me. It was about juggling pressure at work and not knowing how to say, “I’m trying my best.” We weren’t fighting about the clock. We were aching to feel seen. That’s the quiet truth about many marriage arguments: You’re not really arguing about what you’re arguing about. You’re arguing about what’s underneath. The emotion. The unspoken story. The need that hasn’t had a safe place to land. This is why communication in marriage can feel so exhausting—because we’re often trying to solve the surface issue without ever naming the heart issue. But the good news is this: There’s a way to break that cycle. There’s a way to move from reactivity to reconnection. It starts with one intentional conversation. That’s why I created a free resource for couples called the Marriage Meeting Guide. It’s a gentle weekly rhythm to help you check in before things boil over. Inside, you’ll find:
It’s not long. It’s just intentional. And it can change everything. Click here to download the Marriage Meeting Guide Because your marriage deserves more than survival. It was meant for connection, joy and a deep “we” that holds you both—even on the hard days.
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 Let’s be honest—talking about hard things in marriage can feel... hard.
Maybe you’ve tried to bring something up with your husband, but it led to a fight. Maybe you’ve kept quiet to avoid conflict, but now resentment is quietly growing beneath the surface. Or maybe life has just gotten so busy that real conversations are rare, and you’re feeling more like roommates than soulmates. If any of that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. So many women I coach tell me the same thing: “We love each other, but we just don’t know how to talk to each other anymore.” Communication is one of the top areas couples struggle with—and also one of the most powerful places to rebuild connection. That’s why I’m so excited to share a gentle, grace-filled tool called the Marriage Meeting. It’s based on the work of Marcia Naomi Berger in her book Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love, and it’s helped many couples create space for meaningful, kind, productive conversations that draw them closer. What I love most about this format is that it starts with appreciation—which helps both people soften, open up, and feel seen. When a conversation begins with gratitude, the whole tone shifts. Defensiveness melts. Kindness rises. Love grows. I wish I had something like this years ago. I can still remember so many nights when I would be completely drained after a long day with our young children—just waiting for 6 p.m. to come so I could finally hand off the chaos to my husband. But then he’d call. At 6 p.m. To say he wouldn’t be home at 6 p.m. again. I felt unloved. Unimportant. Like I wasn’t a priority. And I was angry—because I was also exhausted. But every time I brought it up, it led to a fight. He couldn’t understand why I was so upset. And I didn’t know how to say it in a way that felt calm, not critical. Over time, those little hurts built walls between us. I needed help. I needed a way to talk about things like this without blowing up or shutting down. That’s what makes this Marriage Meeting format so beautiful. It gives you a rhythm of intentional connection—a chance to say, “Hey, I need help with this,” or “I really appreciated that,” or even “Here’s something I’m struggling with,” in a safe, respectful space. It takes the pressure off the daily dance and helps you both feel seen, heard, and on the same team. And let me just say this: Busyness isn’t an excuse not to have these meetings. It’s the very reason we need them. If you’re craving more peace in your home, more partnership in your responsibilities, and more connection in your marriage—this is a powerful place to begin. I’ve created a beautiful printable guide that will walk you through how to start your own Marriage Meeting. It’s completely free—my gift to you—because I believe in this work, and I know how transformational it can be. Download your free Marriage Meeting Template HERE! You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to start the conversation.  I hear this from wives all the time:
“I’m doing everything—and it’s still not enough.” “He has no idea how much I do around here.” “We’re not a team anymore. We’re tallying points.” You’ve tried everything to fix it. You’ve talked. You’ve hinted. You’ve stayed quiet. You’ve snapped. And yet—you keep having the same fight, over and over. You’re exhausted. Not just in your body, but in your soul. And somewhere deep down, you might be wondering… Is it always going to feel like this? Let me reassure you: The problem isn’t that your marriage is failing. It’s that you are hurting from carrying too much, too often, with too little return. You’re not wrong to feel what you feel. You’re just in a pattern. Let’s begin to shift it. Here’s a grace-filled 3-step reset: Step 1: See yourself first. Before you try to repair anything, pause. Acknowledge all that you’ve been holding. You are not invisible. Your efforts are sacred. Speak this aloud: “God sees me. I’m doing holy work. And it matters.” Step 2: Shift your mindset. Start noticing what he does right. Not because it cancels out what’s wrong—but because it changes you. When you train your mind to look for good, your heart starts to soften too. Say thank you for taking out the trash. For going to work. For making the kids laugh. This isn’t about pretending. It’s about rebalancing your inner world. Step 3: Offer kindness without expectation. Not because he deserves it, but because you are rooted in love, not resentment. Do something thoughtful—big or small. A favorite dinner. A quick errand. A handwritten note. It’s not about keeping him happy. It’s about keeping your heart open and your spirit light. If this hits close to home, I want you to know—you don’t have to sort it out alone. I offer complimentary consultations to help women like you get clarity, reset their mindset and explore what real change could look like. If you’re tired of feeling stuck, I’d love to talk with you. You can click here to schedule a complimentary conversation with me—it’s gentle, safe and all about you. Friend, I know how heavy this can feel. But I also know this: Love offered from a whole heart is never wasted. And effort made in faith never goes unseen by God. One day, you’ll look back and hear these words in your soul: “Well done, good and faithful servant.” You are not alone. You are not too much. You are just tired—and it’s okay to start again with grace.  I don’t know who needs this today, but if summer has already started to feel like too much—you’re not alone.
If the days feel loud before the coffee even brews… If your feet hit the floor and someone already needs something… If your mind feels like a browser with 37 tabs open and no clear focus in sight-- Take a breath with me. Not a shallow one. A d e e p, g e n t l e i n h a l e. Hold it. Exhale slowly. Now, let’s talk. This Season Was Supposed to Feel Sweet… The school year ended, and you had high hopes. Maybe you imagined slower mornings, sun-soaked afternoons, laughter echoing through the house. And maybe some of that has come true. But also… There’s laundry piling. Dishes clinking. Schedules colliding. There’s sibling arguments, snack requests and no quiet space to hear your own thoughts. There’s the weight of being the emotional thermostat for your family—keeping everyone cool and calm when inside, you feel anything but. You love your people. But you’re tired. And somewhere in the middle of it all… you’ve gone missing from your own story. You’re Not Broken. You’re Just Overloaded. Can I speak something true over you? The problem isn’t that you can’t handle it. The problem is that your mind and heart are carrying more than they were ever meant to. Mental load is real. Emotional exhaustion is real. And it’s not selfish to admit it—it’s sacred. You don’t need to push through harder. You need someone to help you lay a few things down. Let’s Create a Pocket of Peace—Together. I’d love to offer you a space to breathe—a quiet corner of the week just for you. I’m offering a complimentary coaching consultation for moms who feel like they’re running on empty this summer. Here’s what we’ll do together in our time:
Because I’ve walked with moms who forgot how to exhale—and I’ve helped them remember. Not with magic. Not with perfection. But with rhythms of rest, renewal and grace. You’re Not Alone—and Change Is Possible. If something in this resonated with your heart, I’d love to meet you. You can book your complimentary session right here: www.calendly.com/tinahaisman It’s okay to ask for help. It’s brave to choose yourself. And it’s powerful to believe that things can feel different. Sending you love, peace, and deep permission to pause. You are seen, you are loved, and you are not alone.  I can remember the exact moment I broke.
Dinner was ready. Kids were fussy. I was fried. And then my phone buzzed. It was my husband letting me know—again—that he wasn’t going to make it home in time for dinner. That was not what I needed. What I needed was someone--especially him—to see how hard I was trying to hold it all together. He wasn’t coming. And I felt it all at once: Unloved. Unimportant. Invisible. Alone. So, I did what I had done many times before: I got angry. I snapped. We fought. And for years, we cycled through that same pattern—frustration, blame, silence, repeat. The more I raised my voice, the less I felt heard. We were keeping score—me, on everything I was doing. Him, on everything I wasn’t understanding. And we were missing the one thing that could have softened everything: empathy. What Is Empathy, Really? Empathy is not just “feeling bad” for someone. It’s the sacred pause to say: “Let me try to understand what it feels like to be you right now.” And in marriage? That pause can be everything. On the SYMBIS assessment I use in coaching, empathy is one of the qualities we measure. And so often, couples score low—not because they don’t care about each other, but because they are too tired, stretched and hurt to slow down long enough to care well. When You’re Both Carrying a Lot In the thick of marriage and motherhood, we’re all carrying something heavy:
We keep score. And we forget that marriage is not a competition—it’s a covenant. Empathy isn’t about excusing behavior. It’s about softening your heart just enough to see the person behind the pain. What Helped Me Shift Years into our marriage, I started learning how to say: “I’m feeling overwhelmed right now. I need help tonight—can you be home by 6?” And my husband started saying things like: “I’m sorry. I know that matters to you. I’ll do my best.” Did it fix everything overnight? No. But it softened the atmosphere. It stopped the fighting. And it helped us start working on the real stuff beneath the surface. A Question for Your Heart Today If your marriage feels tense, disconnected or full of unspoken resentment—take a breath. Ask yourself: “Where could I pause and choose empathy instead of offense?” And maybe even more gently: “Where do I need empathy right now—from God, from my spouse or from myself?” You’re Not Alone Marriage isn’t easy. But it is holy. And it becomes more sacred—not less—when you learn to lead with grace instead of keeping score. If you’re craving more empathy in your marriage but don’t know where to begin, I’d love to walk with you. Coaching gives you the space to process and the tools to move forward with clarity and grace. Book a free consultation or send me a message if this resonates. I’d be honored to hear your story.  Thirty years ago we stood at an altar and promised forever.
Recently we stood again—older, wiser, softer—and renewed those vows in a quiet church with our son and daughter by our side. It was sacred and simple…and it meant the world. After raising children, building a life, weathering storms and celebrating joys—we’ve stepped into a new season: the stillness of an empty nest. The house is quieter now. The calendar isn’t quite so full. And we’re learning what it means to choose each other again—on purpose, with tenderness and with the wisdom of everything we’ve been through. We’re making room for us in new ways. We’ve started taking ballroom dance lessons. We’re planning little getaways. We’re talking more intentionally—listening, laughing and leaning into the beauty of simply being together. It hasn’t always been easy. There were days we wondered if we’d make it. But oh… it has all been worth it. This vow renewal was more than a ceremony—it was a celebration of growth, grace, grit and choosing love again and again. Reflection for You Maybe your love story is in a tender season. Maybe you feel the distance, the change, the ache of transition. Let this be your reminder:
A Gentle Invitation If this stirred something in your heart—if you're longing to reconnect, recommit or simply feel closer to the one you love—I’d be honored to walk with you through it. Marriage coaching is one of my greatest joys. Schedule a complimentary consultation HERE!  You know that moment.
The one where your shoulders are tight, your patience is thin and someone—usually small and sticky—is screaming about the wrong color plate. And you snap. You didn’t want to. You told yourself you wouldn’t. But the day was long, the demands were many and you reached the end of your rope. So many of the moms I coach come to me feeling like they’re failing simply because they lose their temper. But I always say this: You are not failing. You are simply full. Your nervous system is overwhelmed, and your spirit is crying out for a pause. That’s why I love teaching this simple, powerful tool I call the Instant Stress Reset. Here’s how it works: Step 1: Breathe. Pause whatever you’re doing. Put your hand on your heart. Take a slow breath in for four counts. Hold for four. Exhale for four. Do this a few times. Let your shoulders fall away from your ears. Step 2: Speak a gentle truth. Say something like: “This moment is hard, but I am safe.” “I have everything I need to respond with love.” “God, help me see this moment with fresh eyes.” Step 3: Shift the energy. Once your nervous system has settled just a bit, ask: What would love do right now? It might look like stepping outside. Turning on music. Changing the tone. Being silly. Or simply saying, “Let’s try again.” Here's a Real Life Story from My Kitchen Table I remember a night when my daughter—who was three at the time—was in full meltdown mode at dinner. She’s wildly spirited, and parenting her requires a deep well of patience and creativity. That night, I had none. She was crying, complaining about her food and I felt myself rising—ready to snap, ready to lecture, ready to just send her to her room. But I paused. I took a breath. I did my own instant stress reset. And what came to me in that pause was the silliest idea: “Ah-ha! That’s it,” I said. “You must be sitting in the crabby chair!” Her tears paused. “Let’s fix this. Everybody up—it's time for musical chairs!” My husband and older child looked at me like I’d lost it, but they played along. We danced. We laughed. The moment was redeemed. That reset didn’t just change her—it changed me. And that’s the power of taking a sacred instant to breathe, reset and come back to the moment with intention. Mama, You’re Allowed to Pause Sometimes the most loving thing we can do in a hard moment isn’t to power through, but to step back, take a breath and tend to our own hearts. That’s not selfish. That’s sacred. Your kids don’t need a perfect mom. They need a peaceful one. And peace can start in an instant.  Back when my children were in preschool, all of us moms took turns bringing in the snack for the day.
Some moms brought in elaborate, homemade delights—rainbow fruit kabobs, muffins made from scratch, or tiny jars of applesauce lovingly simmered on stovetops. Some offered what I’d call a solid homegrown effort—popcorn popped on the stove or apples neatly sliced beside a scoop of peanut butter. And then there were moms like me--Moms who swung by the grocery store on the way to school and walked in with Goldfish crackers, a pouch of pretzels or applesauce cups with foil lids. I remember one particular morning. Alyssa and I had just dropped Tyler off at kindergarten. We dashed into the store to grab the snack I had forgotten to buy the day before. It wasn’t fancy, but it was done. A small relief. A quiet success. But when we arrived at school, something unexpected happened. As I handed the bag to the teacher, she peeked inside and said with a soft smile, "Oh. You're the simple mom." Oof. That stung. Not because she was cruel—but because, deep down, I feared that maybe being the "simple mom" meant I wasn’t enough. I wasn’t the mom with the Pinterest-worthy snacks. I wasn’t the one showing up with homemade anything. I was just doing my best. And that morning, my best looked like store-bought crackers and getting there on time. But over the years, I’ve learned something: Being the simple mom doesn’t mean you’re falling short. It means you’ve chosen to show up—in the way that works for you. You’ve chosen presence over perfection. Love over performance. Sanity over sparkle. (Don't get me wrong, I LOVE sparkle!) And friend, here we are again, in the chaos of May—the new December. Field trips. Final projects. Class parties. Permission slips. Sports banquets. Art shows. Teacher gifts. Reading logs. Snacks for days. It’s a beautiful, bustling blur. And you, mama, are in the thick of it—holding it all together with a calendar that looks more like a patchwork quilt and a heart stretched in ten directions. But pause for just a breath. And hear me say this: You’re doing an amazing job. Yes, the days are long. Yes, emotions are high. Yes, you’ve served Chick-fil-A twice this week and the laundry pile is plotting a takeover. But this is not failure. This is love in motion. And your kids? They won’t remember whether the cookies were homemade. They’ll remember that you were there—Cheering. Showing up. Taking the picture. Packing the snack. Loving them through the mess. So if today you’re the mom with the Goldfish, know this: You are wildly, wonderfully enough. You’re not behind. You’re right where you’re needed. You’re not failing. You’re finishing strong. This isn’t about snacks. This is about grace. And I see you. Let’s breathe through this final stretch together. And maybe even smile while we do it. Summer’s coming. You’ve got this, mama. P.S. If your soul is craving a little more calm in the chaos, I have a gift for you. It’s called The Ultimate Guide to Guilt-Free Self-Care—designed especially for busy women like you who give so much to everyone else. This isn’t about bubble baths (though those are lovely). It’s about real, life-giving practices that restore your energy, peace, and joy—without the guilt. Click HERE to download your free guide. You deserve care, too, sweet friend.  This Mother’s Day, maybe you’ll be celebrated with flowers or brunch or a hand-written note. Maybe you’ll spend the day doing what you love most. Or maybe it’ll just be a normal Sunday—filled with ordinary chores and tiny moments that don’t make it into the scrapbook.
But today, I want to remind you of something important: your kids won’t remember everything you did… but they will remember how you made them feel. They’ll remember the warmth of your hugs at the end of a hard day. They’ll remember your laugh echoing in the kitchen. They’ll remember how you cheered from the sidelines and waited up late and made their favorite snack just because. They won’t remember the laundry. They won’t remember the mess. They won’t remember that one week you missed a practice or forgot to sign the permission slip. What they will carry with them is your presence. Your love. Your steadiness. So if you feel like you’ve been running on empty lately—or questioning if you’re doing enough—please know: you are. Your love is enough. Your presence is powerful. The way you keep showing up, even when it’s hard… that’s the stuff that shapes hearts and strengthens souls. And if you're needing a moment to breathe, reflect, or feel grounded again, I’d be honored to walk with you. I offer one-on-one coaching sessions to help moms like you reconnect with your purpose, find balance and create space for the life you want to lead. If that sounds like a gift you’d like to give yourself, you can learn more and book a session HERE! To every mom reading this: you’re doing sacred work. You’re raising humans. You’re loving deeply. You’re doing better than you think. Happy Mother’s Day. 💐  When my children were little, summer always seemed to stretch out before us like a wide, welcoming field—sunlit, endless and full of possibility.
To make the most of it, we created a simple tradition: a Summer Bucket List. We’d gather around the kitchen table with a pile of colorful sticky notes and dream together. Each of us would write down ideas—big dreams, little joys, silly outings—and we’d stick them all to a bulletin board. That board became our treasure map. On slow days, we’d stand in front of it, close our eyes, point to a note... and off we would go. Some days were grand: a trip to the zoo, an afternoon at the splash pad, a night under the stars with sparklers in hand. Other days were sweetly simple: baking cookies, sidewalk chalk masterpieces, building a fort out of sofa cushions. It was never about doing everything. It was about having inspiration at our fingertips—and permission to enjoy both fun days and slow days. Here’s how you can create your own Summer Bucket List: 1. Gather Your People. Kids, spouse, friends or just yourself. Anyone who wants a voice in the adventure. 2. Dream Freely. No idea is too big or too small.
3. Write It Down. Sticky notes, scraps of paper, an old chalkboard—it doesn’t have to be fancy. The magic is in capturing the ideas. 4. Build a Display. We loved using a bulletin board, but you could also fill a jar, a journal or string notes along a wall with clothespins. 5. Choose As You Go. Some days you’ll crave adventure. Some days you’ll crave rest. Let the list be an invitation, not a to-do list. Fun Days + Slow Days = A Balanced Summer Not every day needs fireworks and road trips. Some of the sweetest summer memories are made in the slow, unscheduled hours. Give yourself—and your family--permission to rest, permission to play, permission to savor. A nap in the hammock. Drippy popsicles on the front porch. Board games while the thunder rolls outside. Evening walks where you spot fireflies. This summer, may your bucket list be more about joy than busyness. More about connection than checking off boxes. More about being than doing. Because these are the days that will linger in your hearts long after the sticky notes have fluttered to the floor. ☀️🌸🌿 This summer, may your bucket list be more about joy than busyness. More about connection than checking off boxes. More about being than doing. And if you find yourself longing for more balance—not just in summer, but in the rhythm of your whole life—I’d love to walk alongside you. As a Life Coach, I help women create lives filled with purpose, presence and peace. If that sounds like something your heart is craving, you’re warmly invited to reach out. Because your life deserves to feel as beautiful as a slow summer day. 💛 Book a Discovery Call HERE! |